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15 secrets for a happy marriage

Achieving and maintaining a happy marriage requires effort and commitment from both partners. Here are 15 secrets to make you and your spouse happier.
Vaughn Christensen, FamilyShare Modified: August 21, 2014 at 2:15 am •  Published: August 25, 2014

“Happily ever after” can be achieved in real life just as it does in fairy tales. Although, it isn’t something that is reached from one minute to the next. It comes from numerous small actions and decisions rightly made.

We don’t have to wait until the end of the story for happiness to be realized. On the contrary, we must seek it out daily. Wise attitudes will contribute to happiness for both partners, and a good dose of sensitivity allows us to find it in the most simple of things.

Check out these 15 secrets to make you both happy.

1. Don’t put off happiness

Some people expect marital happiness to occur when they buy a house, when they have their first car, when they find a better job, or when they get their college degree. Be happy now with what you have.

2. Be grateful and show it to your spouse

Gratitude is directly related to happiness. Recognize, in even the smallest things, reasons to be grateful. Show the gratitude you feel. That little magic word that we learned in childhood should be used abundantly in marriage. Say things like, “Thank you for everything you do for me.” Or, “Thank you for being so nice.” And, “Thank you for the delicious dinner.” Look for reasons to thank your spouse, and you will find them.

3. Trust and be trustworthy

A marriage tormented with jealousy does not last. Trust your spouse, and give them reason to trust you.

4. Avoid arguments

Arguments are the biggest pitfalls in marriage. Instead of becoming offended in a conversation, take some time for things to cool down. Take a walk, a shower or take a little rest. When emotions have calmed, talk things over in a civilized manner.

5. Show your love physically

Touching, caressing, kissing, holding hands and hugging are all essential acts that keep the flame of love burning bright. Healthy sexual relations within marriage are very important, but they should not be the only focus. Abuse of any kind, in turn, is never acceptable. It destroys romantic love and ruins the natural beauty of sexual intimacy in marriage.

6. Be honest in your finances

Marital happiness cannot exist with miscommunications, especially when the topic is money.

7. Surprise your spouse

Do something unexpected. A note in a shirt pocket, a flower when he or she returns home, a little gift, a surprise romantic dinner, a message of love on the phone, a walk, etc.

8. Compliment one another

Give sincere compliments to the person you love. Talk about his or her smile, eyes, hair, character, voice, posture, how he or she acts, the professional or mother or father he or she is. Overall, let you spouse know just how much you admire him or her.

9. Be supportive

Support your spouse in a personal or professional project, or in a moment sickness, sadness or weakness. Help him or her overcome difficulties. “Marriage is like a long journey in a tiny rowboat: if one passenger starts to rock the boat, the other will have to stabilize it: otherwise, they both will sink together.” David Rueben.

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