20-40-60 Etiquette: A perfect wedding gift for a honeymoon?

20-40-60 Etiquette answers uneasiness over how to create a tasteful honeymoon registry that doesn't look like a cash grab. Hilarie Blaney has the Guest answer.
BY CALLIE GORDON, LILLIE-BETH BRINKMAN AND HELEN FORD WALLACE Published: July 7, 2013
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Also, don't include gift information on an invitation. If nothing else, think of what that will look like in a scrapbook — you want to preserve the moment, not the places where your gifts come from.

HELEN'S ANSWER: It is commendable that you realize that some of your guests might prefer the traditional way of gift-giving and hopefully you will honor that by choosing some gift items in a registry that might help them choose something for you if they do not want to contribute to the honeymoon. Since registries of any kind are really just appreciated suggestions, the gift-givers will certainly make their own decisions as to how to they want to spend their money.

Here is a question for you? How will you notify guests about the registries? I still do not think it is appropriate to add where to buy gifts on invitations, and it is almost rude since it implies the gift is more important than the guest. A telephone call to you or family members will get the word out. After all, the people you are inviting to the wedding are your friends and should know you all well enough to know your wishes.

GUEST'S ANSWER: Hilarie Blaney, etiquette and international protocol consultant: I think the honeymoon registry is a great idea. However, spending your time building the registry might be time consuming and you have enough to plan. This registry is a perfect way for the busy and Internet-savvy guests to purchase a memorable experience for a wedding gift.

For the more traditional guests, I would register a few unique items at area shops where they would regularly purchase wedding gifts. The registry is merely a suggestion; therefore, you must not be disappointed if all guests do not participate.

Lastly, as for building your own registry, exchange rates, website links and payment options might be cumbersome and worth the 10 percent to have a well-known wedding planning site do the job.

Callie Gordon is 20-something, Lillie-Beth Brinkman is in her 40s, and social columnist Helen Ford Wallace is 60-plus. To ask an etiquette question, email helen.wallace@cox.net. For more 20- 40- 60 etiquette, go to blog.newsok.com/partiesextra.

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