20-40-60 Etiquette: Baby showers for second- or third children

Is it customary to have baby showers for second and third children? 20-40-60 Etiquette answers with Hilarie Blaney as guest.
by Helen Ford Wallace and Lillie-Beth Brinkman Published: February 24, 2013

Other ideas for second and third showers include: having guests bring books, food items that the new mother might need for her freezer or items for the mother-to-be. People have had grandmother showers and have brought toys for the baby to have at the grandmother's house.

GUEST'S ANSWER: Hilarie Blaney, etiquette and international protocol consultant: As we are well aware, the Post family knows how to handle this dilemma. In the most recent edition, “Emily Post's Etiquette: Manners for a New World” (18th edition), the authors, all relatives of the original Emily Post, note that society is more mobile and that it's not unusual for family members or close relatives to host the shower anymore. They also note that they approve of throwing second or third showers. Finally, because the parents likely have many things that they need, “a theme shower” would be a good idea.

I think EACH child of a friend or relative should be celebrated in some way, either by a gift or a sip-and-see-party, where gifts are not requested, but appropriate and appreciated. Most of your friends and family will want to give you a gift for Baby No. 2 or 3, and some people want to make it a fun event. If so, the gifts lean more toward clothing or the latest trend in baby items because the main baby needs are in place.

Callie Gordon is 20-something, Lillie-Beth Brinkman is in her 40s, and social columnist Helen Ford Wallace is 60-plus. To ask an etiquette question, email helen.wallace@cox.net. For more 20-40-60 etiquette, go to blog.newsok.com/partiesextra.

by Helen Ford Wallace
Society Editor
Helen Ford Wallace is a columnist covering society-related events/news for The Oklahoman. She puts local parties online with daily updates. She creates, maintains and runs a Parties blog which includes web casts. She is an online web editor for...
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by Lillie-Beth Brinkman
Lillie-Beth Brinkman is a Content Marketing Manager for the Greater Oklahoma City Chamber of Commerce. She was previously an assistant editor of The Oklahoman
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