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4 Fair Fighting Tips for a Happy Marriage

All couples fight. These tips will help you make sure your fights don't last too long so you can get back to being happier sooner.
Aaron Anderson, FamilyShare Modified: July 23, 2014 at 5:47 am •  Published: July 28, 2014

Let's face it. Every couple fights. And despite how unpleasant fighting is, sometimes it just needs to happen so that you and your spouse can fix some things and get back on track. But sometimes the fighting doesn't get things back on track. And the fighting can cause even more problems.

The secret to having productive fights (the ones that get your marriage back on track) is to have fair fights. Fighting fair ensures your arguments stay productive and helps you and your spouse get back to being happy together sooner. But fighting fair is hard to do. Afterall, when you fight you just want to give your spouse a piece of your mind and tell them exactly what you think. Here are 4 tips to help you fight fair no matter what kind of mood you're in.

4 Tips for Fighting Fair In Your Marriage

1) Stay on point

When you fight, it's easy to bring up other things that you're mad about, too. So you might start fighting because your spouse is late, again. Before you know it, you're both yelling about how the other person never takes out the trash, either. The problem with this is that when you don't stay on point, you confuse your spouse about what the argument is really about. You may also end up fighting about something other than what you really wanted to talk about which defeats the purpose of bringing it up in the first place. So before you bring up something think about what it is you really want to talk about and stick to it. Don't get distracted, and try to keep your spouse on point, too.

2) No personal attacks

If you want to talk about how your spouse never does nice things for you, you don't need to tell him what a big jerk he is or how stupid he is for never doing nice things for you. These kinds of comments distract from what you really want to talk about and only hurt your spouses feelings. Personal attacks also make the argument hotter than it needs to be.

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