So it falls to Mr. Monday to tackle the story of the week.
Stop Mr. Monday if you heard this one.
A Texas fan walks into a bar. Then he's wheeled out. Very uncomfortably.
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This week's Man vs. Crotch story has turned out to be the talk to the town, racking up 60,000-plus hits on NewsOK.com. Just a few more than this weekly exercise in futility.
(Actually, Mr. Monday is huge on the Internets, by the way, ranking in popularity somewhere between the guy who blends stuff up on YouTube and photos of mutated Chinese people.)
A recap for those of you still reading by kerosene lamp: An OU fan and a Texas Longhorn fan (sporting a UT T-shirt) get into a little verbal spar at a bar.
OU fan kicks it up a notch, deciding to take matters into hand by grabbing Texas guy by his Bevos.
He locks on like a beartrap and doesn't let go until there is a tear.
Mr. Monday knows. It's more painful than it sounds. You'll stop gritting your teeth sometime this afternoon.
Texas fan now has a truckload of stitches and OU guy has some charges pending. No joke. Mr. Burnt Orange is really hurt.
Now scoot close, kids, it's time to listen to Mr. Monday's moral code.
Being a crazy fan has always been a puzzle for Mr. Monday, who has never planted a flag in the front yard, worn body paint or assaulted a man based on his T-shirt choice. (Mr. Monday almost once punched a guy who said he'd never seen "The Godfather,” but come on.)
Some innocent guy's tackle box has been sacrificed to the intensity of the Red River Rivalry. (Note to E.Z. Million: Would a home-and-home series cause or prevent more groin trauma? Discuss.)
No ball game is worth sending someone to the hospital, ya hooligans.
It's a game, played by guys in the teens and twenties. They're having fun! They're celebrating the prime of their lives. If they lose, they get over it. Shouldn't you?
Mr. Monday also hopes OU guy comes out and apologizes.
Even Rhett Bomar did that.
There, see how it feels.
That's how you hurt somebody.
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Let's get the facts out here. I'm hearing from someone at the bar that the Texas guy tried to start a fight with 3 other patrons before knocking the hat off of a 53 year old OSU graduate, who then did what he did. Another fact? Mr. Monday is about as funny as reagular Mondays. And everyone hates Mondays.
Well I hate to say it, but its true. I wonder how much alcohal was involved in this incident? i am sure both parties involved were intoxicated, i mean I know you cant blame that but I am sure neither person would have acted that way if alcohal wasnt involved. Men,football,rival teams and alcohal do not mix. Something is always going to happen.
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Thank you for joining our conversations on NewsOK.com. We encourage your discussions but ask that you stay within the bounds of our terms and conditions. Please help us by reporting comments that violate these guidelines. To review our rules of engagement, go to Commenting and posting policy.
Leave a comment. Log in below or sign up (it's free).Editor's note: It is not our intent to offer comments on crime or fatality stories.