Oklahoma football: Who burned Big Tex?
Big Tex is gone. The icon of the State Fair of Texas, the 52-foot tall statue burned up Friday as the state fair entered its final weekend. You can read the story here.
Officials apparently believe it was an electrical malfunction of some sort (Big Tex’s mouth and head are controlled electronically). That’s a ruse, of course. Clearly, this was arson, and the suspects are plentiful.
* Mack Brown. Beleaguered by the Sooners’ 63-21 rout Saturday, the fourth OU blowout in the series in the 2000s, Mack lit the match, hoping the fire would spread to the whole danged fairgrounds and kill this tradition once and for all. Torching the Cotton Bowl would have been a little obvious. Plus futile. Some things just won’t die, and the Cotton Bowl stadium seems to be just that.
* Big Tex himself. Perhaps this was a self-inflicted wound. I came up with a new nickname for Bob Stoops after the game. Big Tex Bob, a takeoff of other monikers, like Big Game Bob and Big 12 Bob. Maybe Big Tex decided if he couldn’t have the name to himself, life wasn’t worth living.
* Texas Exes. Having seen OU fullback Trey Millard leap over two Longhorns on Saturday, perhaps Longhorn fans figured Millard’s next feat of marvel would be to jump over Big Tex. Rather than give ol’ Trey the satisfaction, they decided to remove the opportunity.
* Fair food artists. Having fried everything from Snickers to jambalaya, maybe the grease kings decided to fry Big Tex. Cook him up, slice off a piece of his shirt and sell it for 10 coupons each, which go for a cool $5.
* Jerry Jones. Maybe killing off a piece of the fair, one by one, will slowly swing momentum to put this game in Arlington, where outside the stadium there is nothing flammable, since oceans of concrete parking lots surround the place.
The suicide angle is already making its way around the world wide web. “Long time Texas icon Big Tex committed suicide this morning on the Texas State Fairgrounds. Sources close to Big Tex told authorities that he had been despondent in recent days and saw no hope for the future after a series of beat downs administered by the Sooners on his beloved Longhorns. In lieu of flowers the family requests donations to the Save Mack Brown’s Job Fund.”
I don’t buy it, of course. I always sort of figured Big Tex as a Sooner fan. I certainly see a lot more OU fans dressed like Big Tex than UT fans dressed like Big Tex. The only Longhorns who dress like cowboys are the UT band, those poor saps who have to shovel up Bevo’s deposits and the UT pom squad. Most everyone else is dressed like an oil baron. The Sooners have their share of those, but they’ve got a bunch of cattle ranchers from western Oklahoma, too.
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