20-40-60 Etiquette---I cannot go to the party
QUESTION: How do I handle this one? I am invited to a wedding shower, but I already know that I cannot go due to a previous commitment. Should I drop off a gift or have it sent online or just not send one since I cannot go? Then, am I supposed to send a wedding gift too? Is one gift for both sufficient?
CALLIE’S ANSWER: Send a gift if you are not able to make it. Also, send a wedding gift as well. Depending on your personal preference, you can do both. When we are talking ‘etiquette’ send a gift to both.
LILLIE-BETH’S ANSWER: Any of your ideas sounds like the right way to handle this.
If you cannot go to the wedding shower and are close to the couple and want to do something, then probably your best idea would be to drop off a gift with one of the hostesses. That way the bride can open it on the day of the shower.
However, since you’ve sent your regrets to the shower, I think you could also simply send a bigger gift for the wedding to cover both presents, whether by mail or online, and forgo a shower gift altogether. I don’t know of an etiquette instance where you’re required to buy a gift for a shower that you do not attend, although it’s a nice, meaningful gesture.
HELEN’S ANSWER: If you are invited to the party and cannot go, send a gift to the honoree. Usually, a gift goes to the wedding also. If you are out of time and cannot get a gift to the shower, take it by the house later, or send something really nice for the wedding. Some of the wedding rules can be expanded to suit your time frame and circumstances. Use your best judgment when it comes to gift giving.
Message Sent Successfully
Be Sure to Check Out Our Top Headlines
- 18441Oklahoma baseball: Joe Simpson 'thrilled' that Sunny Golloway left OU
- 17118OKC Central: Architectural "Worsts"
- 13848Classen School of Advanced Studies valedictorian disappears while hiking with family in Ecuador
- 11264Oklahoma storms: Profile of Life: Megan and Case Futrell
- 9500Was Special Treatment Given in Oklahoma Vice Mayor DUI Traffic Stop?
- 7869Live blog: "The Voice" Season 4 live finale
- 7538Two teacher programs at Oklahoma universities called ineffective
- 7363Oklahoma State football: Mike Gundy lifts Wes Lunt restrictions, but too late
- 7128Red meat might be delicious, but not as nutritious
- 6380Train engineer's vision problems led to deadly Oklahoma wreck, NTSB rules
Back to share with a friend form.
Add More Recipients