20-40-60 Etiquette: Gift-giving

YOU ASK! WE ANSWER! YOU DECIDE!

QUESTION: My name is Julie and I found you on a website for holiday etiquette.. I do have a question: Over the years our families change.

My sister has three adult children and one non- adult child, four all together. Two of her adult children have five kids. Now that makes me a great aunt to these five kids….. Do I really have to buy her grandchildren gifts as well?

When does that connection end??? Now my sister has recently married and her now- new husband has a adult child who has a small son and they want to add him to the mix as well.

It’s getting to the point that our family Christmas has turned into my sister’s family Christmas and we all just have to buy gifts for all her family members.

I have two non- adult children of my own as well to add to the mix.

But I guess my question really is:  Should I buy gifts for all her grandchildren?  And, how do I tell her that I don’ t want to buy for her grandchildren without hurting her feelings?   (It’s getting to the point I don’t even want to spend Christmas with my relatives and every time Thanksgiving comes around I just cringe  because that’s when we all talk about gifts and who is holding Christmas this year….) Hope you can help!

CALLIE’S ANSWER: Now that is a lot of kids!

I would say no… you do NOT have to buy her grandchildren gifts as well. I would maybe ask to draw names.

You can buy for your sister, but all the kids can draw names as to who they give a gift to. This is SO much easier for you and everyone! Happy holidays!

LILLIE-BETH’S ANSWER: So, do you draw names for everyone? That would be a reasonable solution, so that everyone buys one gift and receives one gift.