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Charlotte Lankard: Feeling fearful is normal

Charlotte Lankard looks at fear and how to manage it in the wake of a disaster.
BY CHARLOTTE LANKARD For The Oklahoman clankard@opbuco.com Published: June 18, 2013
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If you were directly affected by the recent tornadoes and are left feeling fearful, that is normal.

Fear is something we all have in common. It may come to us as dread, worry, panic, anxiety, self-consciousness, superstition or negativity — but it will come.

Unfortunately, many of us grew up believing fear is a sign of weakness. We learned at an early age to hide it, but the reality is that it reveals itself in many ways: perfectionism, control, avoidance, procrastination or anger.

If you believe the opposite of fear is courage, think again. The opposite of fear is laziness, indifference, discouragement, defeat, cynicism.

Being courageous is taking a step — even if it is not the best one, even if it is a wrong one. Nobody has all the answers and nobody can see around corners and mistakes, and wrong turns will be made, but a willingness to keep on is a brave thing to do.

If your fears come from the past few weeks or ones you've had for a long time — being afraid of the dark or being alone, afraid of commitment or afraid of flying — facing that fear means taking some action, taking a step, even if it is a small one.

Your fear may mean you choose to join a support group or talk to a spiritual leader or a mental health professional. Your fear may mean you will listen more closely to your local TV weather folks or it may mean building a safe shelter.

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