You two need more help than anyone can give you in a letter, and I hope you will seek it. If he won't go for counseling, you should go without him because I don't think the status quo can last.
DEAR ABBY: My sister and brother-in-law passed away two years ago. I am the only living relative of their 28-year-old son, “Louis.” He is a loner, spoiled and a poor houseguest. I invite Louis over only because I don't want him to be alone at holiday times. My husband, teenage daughter and I have nothing in common with him, and frankly, he spoils our holidays.
How can I stop inviting my nephew without feeling guilty? Or is there another solution? I hate to make waves.
Holiday hater in Canada
DEAR HOLIDAY HATER: If you invite your nephew for fewer holidays you will be able to ease your conscience, enjoy more holidays and allow the young man a chance to become more proactive in planning entertainment for himself.
DEAR ABBY: I may be wrong, but isn't it presumptuous for someone to open the message card on a flower delivery before you get home when the flowers are for you?
Kimberly in Maryland
DEAR KIMBERLY: You're not wrong. The person opening the cards isn't being helpful, but nosy. And it wouldn't be out-of-line to tell the person not to do it again.
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