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There is one piece of marriage advice that can clear up numerous marital problems: communicate. While communication is crucial for the success of any marriage, it can be a lot easier said than done, especially if one partner does not have any desire to sit down and talk.
When my husband and I have disagreements, we often tell the other person what they did was inconsiderate, selfish, rude, etc. If we are upset with one another, we make it a point to let the other person know exactly why we are angry. However, in some situations, when we try to explain these feelings, the other partner gets upset and defensive. It isn’t unusual for either of us to just walk away without trying to finish the conversation.
Some space may be necessary for certain conversations but when communication is left undone, it can lead to a plethora of unkind and unloving feelings. Here are a few things you can do to increase your communication, especially when you spouse won’t talk.
Don’t over-think things
In many circumstances, we begin to think of the worst possible scenario. We begin to think of possible reasons why our spouse doesn’t want to talk to us. This is a terrible habit and one that will only lead to heartache and discouragement. It is important not to assume anything. if your spouse doesn’t want to talk to you, let it be for a while and then come back to the situation. It may not be the right time or place to discuss stressful or heavy issues.
Let it go
It isn’t uncommon for many individuals to hold onto criticizing or unkind comments made by their spouse. In fact, many individuals hold onto these comments and throw them back at the other in a later argument or disagreement. When you do this, you make it unpleasant for your spouse to have any desire to communicate with you. He will not want to communicate for fear any previous comments or issues, especially those with no relevance to the situation, will be brought up again. When you hold onto comments and use them at a later time, communicating with one another becomes a dreaded task and one your spouse might run away from.
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