EDMOND - One year later, Jackie Taylor's pain still feels as fresh as if the tragic loss occurred yesterday.
Her grief, she said, seems a thousand years old.
Even after 52 weeks and countless sleepless nights, the Edmond woman still can't bear to peek for more than a few seconds at the numerous photographs that dot her living-room walls.
The photographs, lasting color images of Taylor's 7-year-old granddaughter, Cynthia M. Britto, and her daughter, Wendy Laraine Camp, 24, provide a glimpse of happier times.
But even those memories cut like a knife through Taylor's heart.
"If any emotion penetrates through, it shatters me," said Taylor, cigarette in hand. "The pain just rolls all over me.
"I cannot deal with it and cope with it, so I have to keep everything at a distance and stay as tough as I can. " Saturday marks the one-year anniversary of the mysterious disappearance of Britto, Camp and Camp's sister-in-law, Lisa Renee Kregear, 23, all of northwest Oklahoma City.
The three traveled to Shamrock on May 29, 1992, to visit Camp's son, Jonathan Noe, now 5, at his father's home. They never returned. Family members last heard from them about 5 p.m. that Friday before Memorial Day when they called to tell Camp's husband, Leon, they were headed home.
Beverly Noe, the boy's grandmother, picked the trio up in Oklahoma City that morning and drove them to Shamrock, said Kym Koch, spokeswoman for the Oklahoma State Bureau of Investigation.
On the return trip, Beverly Noe has told investigators, an argument ensued between her and Camp, her ex-daughter-in-law, Koch said. Noe has said she stopped at a Wal-Mart in Chandler and told the three to get out sometime between 5:30 and 6 p.m. that day.
Two possible sightings of the two women and child at the Wal-Mart have been reported to the OSBI, but Koch said investigators have questions about the validity of the witnesses' statements.
"We haven't been able to get good enough descriptions to determine if the witnesses actually saw them there," Koch said.
Camp and ex-husband Chad Noe were embroiled in a custody dispute over the then 4-year-old at the time of the disappearance. Camp's mother and stepfather, Ed Taylor, said they have continued that court battle, seeking grandparent visitation rights.
In the months since the disappearance, law-enforcement officials have conducted aerial and ground searches of three counties, offered a $5,000 reward for tips in the case, and distributed a picture and information about Britto in five million gas customers' billings.
But none of those efforts has produced any major leads or suspects, Koch said.
Now, the OSBI and the missing trio's families hope a planned national airing of the case on NBC's "Unsolved Mysteries" might provide a break in the case.
A crew from the program arrived in Oklahoma over the weekend for filming this week. The show is expected to be broadcast at the beginning of the new season in September.
For the OSBI, the case hit a standstill at least six months ago.
"We're still actively working it, but I think the agent feels that if we could find the bodies - that's the big question at this point," Koch said.
From the beginning, police have suspected foul play.
Camp, who has multiple sclerosis, left home without prescription medication that she took daily. And, within days of the disappearance, doctors warned that she faced a life-threatening situation.
Also, family members stressed that it was "totally out of character" for the two women not to return home without calling.
And they pointed out that, because of her mother's condition, Britto had been taught how to dial a telephone and whom to call in case of emergencies.
Taylor and the OSBI presume the two women to be dead.
But they hold out hope, albeit slight, that the child may have survived.
"Three months after Cynthia was reported missing, a fairly close friend of the family reported she thought she saw her in the passenger seat of a van in northwest Oklahoma City," Koch said.
"The agent (Jackie Johnson) thinks because of that possible sighting, it's very possible Cynthia could be alive. " But the feeling is, if Camp and Kregear were all right, "they would have called by now," Koch said.
At the urging of Taylor's psychiatrist, the family conducted a memorial service in Mesquite, Texas, last August for Britto and Camp.
But Taylor has repeated time and again that, while she believes her daughter and granddaughter are at peace and with God, she wants to find their bodies so she can lay them at rest.
"It's hard going through the grieving process if you don't have any closure on it," Taylor said, her voice trailing off. "We did have the memorial service, but that's still not the same thing. I want to lay them at rest so I can be at rest.
"I'll never get over this," added Taylor, a librarian at the University of Central Oklahoma. "This is something that's going to be with me the rest of my life.
"But at least it would help me make the next step to where I can begin to try to live normally again. " BIOG: NAME:Archive ID: 541013