— Tight Times, in East Orange, N.J.
DEAR TIGHT TIMES: In truth, Jack is not thrifty; he's cheap. If you want to give him the message that you expect better, do it now, because you won't get if you don't ask. For example, if he asks to use your car, say, “I'd prefer if you drove.” If he does not offer to pay for gas, ask for a donation. Only you can set the criteria by which you choose to be a part of this relationship. If you don't like having to regularly do that, and I don't know why you would, move on.
John Gray is the author of “Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus.” If you have a question, email him at www.marsvenus.com. All questions are kept anonymous and will be paraphrased.