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Stand-up: Obama and Romney draw laughs at dinner

Associated Press Modified: October 19, 2012 at 10:30 am •  Published: October 19, 2012
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NEW YORK (AP) — President Barack Obama and Republican Mitt Romney scored big laughs at the Alfred E. Smith Memorial Dinner, an annual fundraiser at New York's Waldorf Astoria hotel for Catholic charitable work that has drawn presidential candidates since World War II.

A sampling of the best quips from their stand-up routines:

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"I had a lot more energy in our second debate. I felt really well-rested after the nice long nap I had in first debate." — Obama, poking fun at his poor performance in the first nationally televised debate against Romney.

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"As President Obama surveys the Waldorf banquet room, with everyone in white tie and finery, you have to wonder what he's thinking: 'So little time. So much to redistribute.'" — Romney, riffing on conservative complaints that Obama wants to redistribute the wealth.

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"In less than three weeks, voters in states like Ohio, Virginia and Florida will decide this incredibly important election. Which begs the question: What are we doing here?" — Obama, on spending valuable campaigning time in solidly Democratic New York.

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"Find the biggest available straw man and then mercilessly attack him. Big Bird didn't see it coming. By the way, in the spirit of 'Sesame Street' tonight, the president's remarks tonight are brought to you by the letter 'O' and the number 16 trillion." — Romney, on how he prepares for debates, his own plan to defund public television and the national debt.

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