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The debate over age difference

John Gray gives readers advice about their relationships.
By John Gray Published: February 28, 2013

Not Fully Matriculated, in Madison, Wis.

DEAR NOT FULLY: There are many kinds of relationships. As I discuss in my book, “Mars and Venus on a Date,” committed relationships go through five stages: attraction, in which we have physical chemistry with someone; uncertainty, where we question our feelings and sort through our doubts; exclusivity, the first step for commitment; intimacy, which includes both emotional and physical closeness; and, finally, engagement.

Ideally, partners move together through these stages. At any stage, you may discover that your partner is not your soul mate, and you'll start the process again with a new partner. Successful relationships are built on passion, trust, commitment and love. I wish you success in finding all of that. In time, I'm quite certain you will.

John Gray is the author of “Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus.” If you have a question, send email to All questions are kept anonymous, and will be paraphrased.

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