Top 5 signs you are in a diet relationship

BY PATRICIA LEAVY Published: November 2, 2011
Diet relationships are romances where you settle for less, trying to convince yourself it is enough, ultimately feeling unsatisfied.

These are relationships where we accept low-fat love as a substitute for the real-deal. Just like diets, these roller coaster romances aren’t built to last and leave us feeling like failures.

Good relationships are a platform from which to become the best version of ourselves. Diet relationships do just the opposite: they bring out the worst in us.

Instead of worrying about if he’s happy, ask yourself what your relationship brings out in you?

Here are top five signs that that you may be in a diet relationship and tips for building the relationship you really crave.

1. You feel insecure. In healthy relationships no one wonders where they stand, it is clear. Feelings of insecurity will not be fixed with words alone — even if he “says all the right things.”

So, if you’re not sure where you stand share your concerns with your partner in a clear, non-passive aggressive way. If he indicates that your relationship is solid see if he follows-up by showing you, consistently, that you’re on the same page

2. Your partner withholds. If you find yourself waiting by the phone, rereading and over-analyzing emails, and never being certain when you’ll see him again, you may be dating a withholder. Moreover, if he is less-than-impressed with your accomplishments, fails to celebrate your victories, or is uninterested in supporting you during tough times, you are investing poorly and will get little in return.

All of this may be a sign that you are attracted to the classic “bad-boy” whose sexiness grows in direction proportion to his penchant for withholding. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: bad boys are a self-esteem no-no.

But remember, you don’t have bad luck with men; you make your own luck. Instead of decoding his signals start thinking about why you are attracted to someone who withholds and commit to making better choices.

3. The relationship is melodramatic. If you’re relationship is a rollercoaster of great highs and great lows, you will not find the authentic fulfillment you seek.

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