Jack Bauer of "24” tweets:
→Testified before Congress. Got snatched by FBI. Uncovered big plot. Used a ballpoint pen as a handy weapon. Slow morning so far.
→Spotted wrong boots on an assassin. Good thing terrorists aren’t familiar with FBI-issue footwear. I’d kill for a mocha latte about now.
→The Counter Terrorist Unit: We do more before 9 a.m. than most covert ops agents do all season.
→Does anyone else hear ticking?
→Discovered a mole and gave him what he deserved. That’ll teach that rodent to mess with my petunias. Now, back to terrorist chasing.
→Turns out a guy I thought was working for US was really working for THEM. Did not see that coming.
→Did you know a soda bottle, some muriatic acid and aluminum foil make a cool bomb? I’d kill for some Cheetos and a Red Bull.
→Caught a woman on a bench by the Lincoln Memorial suspiciously jotting numbers. Confiscated her notes. What’s a sudoku?
→Forgot to feed the cat. Sorry Sprinkles. Or are you really Sprinkles?
→My analyst thinks paranoia is causing my anger management problems.