Yet, boys and girls, since the beginning of time, have grown up exploring their sexuality and feeling guilty and ashamed of a normal rite of passage. Why then do we think that once a couple says "I do,” they will automatically embrace and explore and enjoy the sexual act? I have spoken with too many women who have never been able to enjoy a sexual relationship with their partners because they were taught as children that sex is dirty, wrong or sinful, and something to be feared. The generation in which I grew up did not talk about sex, while today's society flaunts and exploits it. Neither way is healthy or honors that vital part of our selves. If any adult who speaks with teenagers is not comfortable being honest about sexual awakening, then find someone who is. Our kids deserve better. Charlotte Lankard is a marriage and family therapist and director of the James L. Hall Center for Mind, Body and Spirit at Integris. E-mail: email@example.com. Web site: www.charlottelankard.com.